Proud Corazon

..Say that I’m crazy or call me a fool but last night it seemed that I dreamed about you…

I’ve always been big on dreams. After my Uncle David died I started having dreams about him. I know that sounds weird because he was my uncle but he was one of my very best friends and when he passed away suddenly, it broke my heart. The first time I had a dream with him in it I remember waking up so happy that I got to see him and hug him but so incredibly sad because I knew he was still gone.

…When I opened my mouth what came out was a song and you knew every word and we all sang along…

It wasn’t until 4 years later that I became a momma.

When Isla was around 9 months old, I had a dream. It has been a while since I had dreamed of Uncle David so I was pleasantly surprised when he showed up. I was holding Isla and he asked to hold her. Of course I said yes but I also told him that since she had never seen him before she might get scared. Wrong. She was scrambling to get out of my arms and into the arms of my Uncle David. As soon as he had her she hugged him… put her head on his chest… touched his face. Uncle David held her, chuckled, and hugged her back. It was the strangest thing. She had never ever met him but she was in love with him and was acting as if she actually missed him. When he hugged her he touched his forehead to hers and asked “Have you missed me?? I miss you!” and he laughed and hugged her again. It was like they already met somewhere and were so excited to finally be reuniting.

And then I woke up.

I replay it so many times in my head. I’m scared to lose it. Scared to forget. It was during that dream I realized that even though two people who mean so much to me never met in this world, doesn’t mean their spirits don’t know each other.

Please, don’t think I’m crazy. This has helped heal my heart so much. So, I guess what I’m trying to say is, as we go through our lives we are going to lose people we love with our whole heart. People who will leave a void in our life and you’re going to miss them. That’s okay. They’re always going to be watching and they will find ways to come back to you.

Some days I feel so sad because I have a handful of pictures of Uncle David and that’s about it. Then one day I handed something to Isla and she said “Thaaaaank YOU!” and walked away. Mini David. Her attitude, the way she says or does things, the way she says thank you… I didn’t show her that. She already knew… because they already knew each other.

…To a melody played on the strings of our souls and a rhythm that rattled us down to the bone…

As I wrap this up I’ll just toss this out there. When the movie Coco came out I watched it and sobbed like a child. Why? It rang so true with my culture and how Mexicans honor their loved ones who have died. When I heard the song at the very very end the memory of that dream came exploding to the front of my mind and with it came every emotion I could feel.

Our love for each other will live on forever. In every beat of my proud corazon…

So, Halloween and Dia de los Muertos are here. Take a minute to remember the loved ones in your life who have passed on. They may be gone from “the land of the living” but their love for you will carry on forever and ever.

Uncle David
Grandma and Grandpa

2 thoughts on “Proud Corazon

  1. Beautiful! CoCo hit me really hard too! It reminded me sooo much of my grandpa who had recently passed away he always told me he would take me to his Tierra and show me the beautiful women with rosie cheeks like mine. lol My nephew Makai will do and say somethings like he remembered grandpa or will wake up talking about him like maybe he visited him in his dreams. I know he is with us and I know he loves us and his great grandson. Feliz Dia De Los Muertos!


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